#310


THURSDAY 30 AUG 07:

when i went to school today, it was full moon! saw at marsiling mrt there. so cool sia! tried to take it but my camera didnt really catch it well. ): haiz. and it was one of the nicest full moon i saw so far, cos there were clouds around the moon, so that it looked like those really scary nights in movies when theres a full moon and werewolves start coming out. SO COOL. got back ppr today. my best result so far. and my mum translated that as 'my best result already', which is like 100% different in meaning. lucky my dad heard what i said, then after that he said that if i said it was 'my best' or 'my best already', he'll surely kill me. haha... XD my dad is nice (: anyway, i thought today last day of cca... sadly, still have to go for cca for the 1st week of term 4. ): haizzz. anyway, went home with wenyi. the sec 3s had practice paper so they didnt come for cca. theory today was just copying down stuff. =.=" haiz. have theory homework too. zzz.

came home and ate dinner, while talking to my dad. he ordered a GUITAR!!!! like whoa. I LOVE YOU DAD. then we talked a lot about guitars and later moved on to talking about nuts. (: he was eating nuts, you see, and theres lots of different types of nuts and all. i seriously cant believe he really ordered a guitar!!! i havent cancelled that out on my wishlist yet, cos i need to see it before i believe. (: he said he'll have to go collect it when he has to. he didnt really say when though. he told me he didnt really buy that for me, but more of for himself, cos he wants to learn, but anyway its gonna be at home so i can learn too. and he says his friend, who's a lead guitarist of a band, is going to teach him how to play. my dad used to learn guitar when he was young but he totally forgot it already. haha... I CANT WAIT TO SEE THE GUITAR. and my dad says that next time if either he or me can play very well, he'll buy an ELECTRIC GUITAR!!! oh my gods. i seriously cant wait (: I LOVE MY DAD COS HE KNOWS ME WELL AND HE JUST ROCKS. an electric guitar, for goodness sake! :O although he did say that the neighbours might start complaining. hahaha.... ;D

[MY DAD ORDERED A GUITAR!!!!!!!! YEAH!!!!!!!]

sometime after i finished dinner, when i was doing science homework, jessica smsed me to say no school tml cos of power failure. i was totally shocked. called her a few times cos her network was busy and finally got through, and she said it was true. then zhuangyun smsed me the same thing. so i called yiinghuey to see if she received the message. after that, yiinghuey called our form teacher, who said that it was true too. so yiinghuey told me and i finally believed. spent about 20mins talking to yiinghuey on my handphone while playing soccer 3D on my handphone and lying on my bed. until my mum told me that i was wasting money by doing so cos got handphone bills to pay. said bye to yiinghuey, dumped all my homework in some corner of the computer room, and went to brush my teeth then sleep. it was so sudden. my mum didnt really believe but she still accepted it in the end. i was thinking to myself what i'll do tomorrow, since i'll be so bored.


FRIDAY 31 AUG 07:

i woke up at 12:54pm on my watch. realised that i was going to be bored today, so i smsed crystal to ask her if she knew when yiinghuey's piano exam was going to end and if she was going to fuchun with yiinghuey. i didnt go anywhere. neither rosyth nor fuchun. i just stayed at home reading percy jackson and the titan's curse. amazing... when all the other teenagers in singapore are probably visiting their teachers or going out with their friends. haiz. later, crystal called me to ask if she and yiinghuey could come over. i smsed my dad and he said ok. then i smsed crystal back but she said yiinghuey wasnt coming already. she had to go home to study. ): poor thing.

i met crystal at marsiling mrt and she came over. she wanted to play my violin when she saw it. then after that i played it. we turned on the computers. then crystal asked me if i had the piano accompanient paper thing for my exam. dug around for a while and found it. so i played violin while she played piano. it sounded nice together, seriously. last time when i played with the professional piano accompanient, i didnt bother about the piano sound at all, as long as i knew where to come in. so i didnt really listen to what the person was playing. but now that i listen to crystal playing, i think violin and piano sounds really nice together (: we did 3 songs, but not fully. all halfway... haha. i was eating lunch at the same time. after that, we played audition. i played on my laptop and she played on my bro's computer. so fun :D played for quite a while and then she had to go. around 5.30pm. ): sad, but i had fun today XD playing together with crystal on the piano makes playing the violin so much more fun and lively, no longer boring because theres only one instrument and one sound. thanks for coming over, crystal.

anyway, i want to watch videos now (: see you.

#309

there was the leadership handover ceremony today. didnt really know those ppl who came out though. only recognised a few like genin, debbie, and jessica, cos they're my seniors. genin came out twice (: haha. that day she wanted to play sudoku with me, but the stupid sudoku take sooo long to load, then in the end we never play. sad... and genin is always so busy... dunno when's the next time i can chat with her. haiz.

anyway, pc period i dont know what was going on, cos i was chiong-ing homework.

then chinese we did 公函 and teacher called me out to do. please lor... i didnt even copy down the question, how i know whats the person's name and address? haiz. in the end borrowed from lynette but hers was wrong too. haha. oh well. that piece of homework i totally forgot lor. haiz. i only did the 长文缩短, which she didnt go through in the end. HAIYO. make me chiong for nothing.

home ec period, there was fire drill. and our whole class was like strolling there. lol. linglan was saying that if it was a real fire, she sure take her schoolbag down. i think i also same bah. if not have to buy all the schoolbooks again, dunno how much, im not so rich lor. after fire drill, we returned to class, then went library. supposed to go through cookbooks but i ended up reading storybook. o.O naiying was in there, with abigail i think. although abigail doesnt know me anyway. haha. but i know her. anyway, our group discussed a while with teacher, then aft tt linglan photocopied some recipes and that was all. oh yah, and we saw a weird scene while coming up to the library. lol...

recess i stayed in class reading my newly borrowed book and a pack of ruffles which yiinghuey gave me. thanks yiinghuey! (: teacher sort of scolded us so me and linglan went to specs stand to read, but went back to class not long ltr cos there was a gathering there.

science lesson we went chem lab and saw some really cool experiments. (:

maths we did graphs as usual and got back our playground models. me and yiinghuey didnt really want to keep, so didnt know what to do with it. but in the end teacher took ours. though i was thinking of dumping it into the bin.

tw i dont know what went on. i think i was reading the whole time bah. i know got one part lynette asked me about science and i was like 'i dunno' cos i couldnt be bothered, especially not when im reading an interesting book.

after school, i went home with crystal. had to drag 4 files home. =.=" so heavy! ): crystal got her bus! ;D haha. came home and was very tired. slept but my mum scolded me, so i had to wake up and eat dinner and do homework. i did art. im supposed to finish this science survey but i think i'll do it tml. very sleepy now. nighty night.

#308

today morning went to buy food at yck mrt stn, cos i know tt we're not gonna have much time to eat. haiz... i wanna eat instant noodles like some other ppl... but too bad i dont have a thermos flask. ): boohoo. anyway, i bought donut and ham and cheese bread. lessons sian as usual. had morning jog but only 2 rounds and indoor route somemore (; recess we went to practice at gym. drama enrichment we also went to practice at gym. then aft tt, cos our group is siao de, we went to EAT :O then we were all talking about vomiting in the gym later that afternoon. haha... lucky we never. our group was 4th and 2nd last group to present. actually 6 groups but today only 5 present. our group was like lan diao lah... so pathetic. and [SORRY!] i missed out one scene when i was narrating. paiseh. after that went for cca - we watched movie today XD the haunted mansion. i watch before but its fun to watch again (: and its quite funny too. dunno why ppl screamed... its not really scary. unless you watch the movie all alone and at night lah... then have reason to scream. oh well. after cca wenyi had to stay back for stuff so i went home with wanjane. talked about teachers and computers. =.=" lol. very tired today but still have to do homework.

currently finishing up geog portfolio assignment with yiinghuey. zzzz... im SLEEPY. oh and i know wanjane likes to say "我们是pro的lor." haha XD

#307

I WATCHED FINISH MARS! YEAH! it was freaking nice man. XD but very few people watch so heck.

The water between khatib and yck stn was really plain today, no colours at all, just dull blue all the way. i was thinking maybe it shows that the day was going to be dull too. at yck mrt stn, i went to buy food for 9am. haha... finally. i always dun buy my own food de. lol... always kop other ppl de. anyway i bought cos i was thinking i probably wont be eating recess. and how right i was. we were supposed to practice the gym/elit stuff during recess but ended up hardly doing anything. but i can do a handstand! (: now just need to learn how to stay up there for longer time. its so fun. lessons a bit de sian. english period had people come in to film our class for news or sth... dunno lah. anyway they keep taking our group cos nearest to the door =.=" haiz. then last period had clit test. i dunno what got into me but i totally just left the last question blank. and it was like 4 marks. :O haha. but anyway i siao siao de lor... one and a half years never leave blanks on test papers liao leh... sad. break record. lol. but i really couldnt be bothered. cos the test open book, but last question is you have to think of answer yourself, then i lazy mah... and anyway no answer to copy so dun write anything lor. plus i was sleepy. so might as well sleep. i have a cant-be-bothered attitude. XD yay me.

today i come home dunno do what lor. waste my time dunno do what. i also dunno leh... watch videos, crap, oh yah dinner i started debating crap with my brother. at first from brinjal [cos we had that for dinner], then fruits and vegetables, then to fish. oh yah then suddenly i say i want to ride motorbike, then he say he ride liao, and i told him i know, then we started talking about motorbikes then dunno how come become flying motorbikes. o.O then the fish part, he say he's a fish master, and then say self-claim and self-something is the same meaning, and i say he's a fish idiot, but he say he never self-claim. ohmygod so lame. but anyway we're lame lah. i made him use his earphones today so his computer is like so damn quiet. YEAH! 我成功了! haha. cos his computer always very noisy de, cos he watch videos all that, on until our neighbour can hear sia! i bet he's blasting his ears right now with his earphones but i dont really care about that.

i had a dream yesterday night. i was with my group of friends and we were hanging out at this mrt stn. beside us was another group of teenagers, and they were much cooler than us. anyway, there was this guy in their group who was playing the guitar and it sounded damn nice. and i was really shocked because i didnt even have any money to buy a guitar or go for lessons, and i really wanted to play it as well as him. and then time was blurry and it was either the same day or a few days later, there was the guy and for some reason my friends were pestering him [the guys]. and i was freaking pissed at them cos he obviously didnt like them pestering him and quickly went up the mrt platform. and i was staring at his guitar all the way. I WANT A GUITAR! argh. i must really want a guitar to have such a dream. HAIZ. and i want to play well too.

unfinished homework. geog and science. ): boohoo. and i started bringing stuff home =.=" so heavy sia. stupid science file. and must start studying from wednesday. argh. holidays i bet i maximum can go out 3 times only lah. what a waste. cant wait till december holidays. it'll be muchmuchmuch better. XD and looking forward to relaxing after EOYs. yepp thats all. chiong homework!!! (:

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"理论的世界还真是愚蠢" The world of theories is really very stupid.

"不过好像越愚蠢的事, 人们往往越容易被蒙蔽" But it seems the stupider something is, the easier people are fooled.

#306

you can just take it that i've been watching too much videos and skip this. its probably a whole chunk of nonsense to you. but maybe its the fact that i think too much into things, or just because im bored. i heard a few quotes and have been thinking about them...

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"幸福其实是建筑在别人的不幸上" Happiness always comes from others’ misery.

"幸福只不过是一场骗局" Happiness is just a scam.

The thrill of killing someone.

"幸福其实是建筑在别人的不幸上". dont your own happiness come mostly from other people's misery? not always, perhaps, but most of the time yes. well i suppose most people wont agree, because there are some things which seem to benefit everyone. so here comes in "幸福只不过是一场骗局". i know that this is from the negative point of view. the positive one would probably be something like "being happy just for a minute in a whole hour would be worth the other 59 minutes of unhappiness". but is it really worth it? isnt happiness something you can never grasp hold of completely and fully? isnt it just an illusion?

lastly, the thrill of killing someone. i shant go into details, but do you ever hate someone so much that you feel like killing that person? although i wouldnt say hate, because i believe in another quote "仇恨是最要不得的". but if you dont mind the rules, would you want to kill people just for the fun of it? i know some people who would. and they wouldnt even regret it. maybe i'll do something like that if i was crazy. to me, a life is still a life. but if you look from their point of view... well then, killing is just pure fun.

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just take it that im talking nonsense. and rather weird nonsense too. as for my normal life, i watched videos for the whole of saturday and im supposed to do homework today. stuck at maths though. amazing, being stuck at one of my best subjects, you'd think. but im always stuck at maths. its a wonder how i even get an A for it. oh well. i've got quite a load of homework, but not really important ones. its almost the end of the term! woohoo! YEAH. ;D i cant wait for the holidays. i planning to go swimming because i havent swam in a long time. more than a year. :O haha. probably will go jogging too. and i might have to go for some gatherings, some of which i wouldnt really be looking forward too, but... i'll still go i suppose... and of course i'll have to relax a bit. but most importantly, i'll have to study. if i ever get myself working, that is. ^^'' EOYs are coming. and oh how fast it is. just a few more weeks... haiz.... and i thought we still had 2 months or so.

as for teacher's day... i dont know. i might just skip the whole thing. considering how crowded it'll be, i might as well stay at home. somehow im not feeling very 'into' rosyth stuff right now ): sorry rosyth peeps. but it'll seriously be crowded, and we havent visited the teachers for ages, so they'll hardly even recognise us anymore. but hey, even though i might not feeling like going to visit, i know there'll always be a place in my heart for rosyth. (: i suppose i might be afraid of going back, because i havent been there for so long and probably no teachers would recognise me and also because im scared that the place is going to change. i dont want it to. i'll just keep it the way it was in my mind, when i was there from p4 - p6. i dont want to go back to see all the new changes, because i liked it only during the time i was there. it was a great piece of memory. just like fuchun was a great piece of memory for me too. but only during the time i was there from p1 - p3. so now that its shifted, i dont think i'll visit either. you can say i like living in the past. i agree.

and anyway, i hardly feel like a part of fuchun or rosyth anymore. its like being split between the two schools and i cant choose either. i dont belong in fuchun because i've been gone for so long, and i dont belong in rosyth because no one recognises me. i'll just belong at home where i can catch up on my sleep. i might go back to rosyth if time permits and my friends are going, but i suppose its quite unlikely. its just a memory now. i'll just keep everything the way it is in my mind all the while, and keep moving forward to see what i can achieve. i dont like to see changes.



im not sure what has gotten into me today, but i know that i didnt say anything wrong either. (: wheeee time to do homework. have a good 14 more hours or so before school starts. ;D
35 MORE DAYS TILL EOYS! STUDY HARD PEOPLE! (: [and somehow i never include myself. haizzzz.]

#305

i came home around 4+pm and about 5mins after i came home, i started feeling extremely dizzy. yes im still feeling dizzy now, but i cant sleep so i dunno how else to rest. just now while i was reading stuff and filing my maths, i was swaying from left to right... scary. i've hardly ever been like that before. this isnt headache at all. its just plain giddy. sherilyn might have been a bit right after all when she said i might faint. oh well. i think im dizzy due to not just one reason. here's the most likely reasons i can think of so far: 1) i dont have enough sleep. 2) i did a lot of gymnastics today. 3) i've only eaten 3 proper meals in school for the last 2 weeks. counting both recess and lunch. 4) i didnt drink enough water today. 5) i've been really stressed lately and doing a lot of work.

oh man... i sort of feel like vomiting but i know i wont, cos i didnt eat enough for me to vomit. i feel really really sick... argh. this isnt good. hopefully i'll recover after a night's rest. i shall go on anyway.

Thursday 23 Aug 07:
was later than usual for school. sufyan too. i was revising science on the train but eventually fell alseep. school was sian. yiing huey gave me bread (: thanks. lots of hw for the weekend ): sad. we had the chinese hsk test briefing and did a sort of trial. i thought it was really difficult. luckily im not taking the real one. during cca i was 1/3 listening to the course, 1/3 studying science, and 1/3 slacking. wanjane bought food and i bought H20 XD met my brother's friend at the mrt stn. really surprising. at first when she smiled at me, i just felt that she was very familiar. then she asked if i forgot who she was, and i realised who she was. =.=" haha. she asked that probably cos i didnt really have much reaction when she smiled at me. but still quite paiseh anyway... forgot who she is. lol... after theory lesson, it rained really badly. thanks for the umbrella carol. i went cwp to shop [bought a nice notebook from popular] and dry off, and reached home at 9.40pm. ate dinner at 10 and started revising science. fell asleep around 11, and woke up at 1am. studied until 3am and finally went to bed.

Friday 24 Aug 07:
woke up at 5.45am. so little hours of sleep sia. chem test was ok - yay (: somehow i was quite awake for the 1st half or so of today. o.O wanted to go home with crystal but she had rehearsal. met lydia at the bus stop so i sort of went home with her. met sherilyn on the train [so qiao. i was walking to the other end to take the escalator and she was around the other end. lol.] we talked a bit and i told her what time i slept yesterday. then she said something like 'later you faint on the way arh.' and i was like 'tsk'.

ok thats all. i really feel very sick and feel like vomiting. doubt i can continue much longer. bye.

1) today's damn cold again.

2) had PE test and 听写 today.

3) got back science unsw paper today.

4) got scolded during maths lesson today. one of my first times. oh well.

5) 我今天的心情超不爽.

#303

my 1st main point - heres something you shouldnt do: make me extra pissed when you know that im already very pissed at you. i havent been this angry at the ppl ard me for quite a while already. for my friends, i know they seldom make me very pissed so i dont explode in front of them. but as for my brother, hell i feel like killing him. i swear i'll get my revenge someday.

my 2nd main point - its like damn cold today la... i was freezing in the morning when i woke up, in school after clit, and during dinner too. freezing to death... brrrrr....

my 3rd main point - school was ok. i was damn sleepy again in but amazingly only slept during clit. during assembly i was damn tired... wanted to sit on the floor cos very exhausted standing up... didnt sit down though, even if i really felt like collapsing.. haiz... after school i stayed back to wait for yiinghuey. poor zhuangyun stomach pain. ): hope you'll be alright by tml, zhuangyun (: after yiinghuey finished her noticeboard thing, we learnt 听写 until the uncle came to close the classroom.

my 4th main point - i have to learn for 听写 which is tml. and that sucks cos its hard to do since im so damn tired. just have to try my best... argh. then tml night have to do 报章读后感... so irritating. i think this week i also dont need to sleep again liao lor. can camp to stay up every night liao. by end of week 10 my eyebags are gonna be seriously like panda liao lah.

my 5th main point - i realised that we only have like 37 more days to study for EOYs. like ohmygod. i didnt realise. i thought we had like 2 months more lah. ohmygoshhhh. thanks for reminding me yiinghuey. 37 days? i think sept hols i also have to camp up late every night liao lo. O.O so 惨... i feel so pressurised. i thought the EOYs were so far away. haha. oh well. sept hols hope not much homework. i seriously need to study. if not i come back sch in term 4 can die liao. i wont know a thing.

randomness - im freaking sleepy but yet i cant sleep. cant wait to finish learning 听写. then can finally sleep. and i still have other problems. argh. so i shall finish my stupid 听写now and get some rest. (: remember... 37 MORE DAYS TO EOYS!!! :O

#302

i havent blogged for 4 days. on tuesday at night i fell asleep [AGAIN. i said told zhuangyun so many times that at night i halfway do stuff will fall asleep, until she will auto say 'again'] and woke up at either 11.30 or 12.30. studied maths for about one hour, though i was really freaking angry at myself during the first 5 minutes or so.

wednesday after school there was this survey thing. after that i went home with yiinghuey and lydia. violin lesson was good cos i was serious and had more energy [normally i very tired aft i come home frm sch so during lesson feel like sleeping]. so i played the songs better and all. (: teacher didnt complain for the whole lesson. hmm... quite unbelievable. XD reached home, worked on crystal's present, and did history assignment.

thursday --> [HAPPY BIRTHDAY CRYSTAL!!! MAY YOU HAVE A GREAT YEAR AHEAD AND YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!] me and yiinghuey stopped crystal while she was walking past our class and gave her our presents. school was ok. during cca, a senior was watching video and since she was sitting next to me, i watched it too (: although i already watched that video before. didnt wait for anyone after cca cos they said exco meeting would take long. theory lesson was boring and someone copied all my answers again. i was studying geography. anyway, i've gotten used to her copying already although im still quite 不爽 about it. but i suppose shes used to this kind of thing in her school so i'll just give in. i wont gain nor lose anything from it. shes the one on the losing side. she'll find that out in the long run. thursday night i studied geog and fell asleep [again].

friday morning my mum woke me up at 4.40am so that i could study geog. thanks mum (: calculated the time of the train so that i wouldnt have to see sufyan in the train. cos i wouldnt be able to concentrate on studying. unfortunately, i ended up sleeping in the train while halfway studying so it didnt really matter i suppose. =.=" geography test was alright. LUCKY THEY NEVER TEST LAND POLLUTION SIA. if not i sure die. cos the first 2 was air and water pollution. then i read front first mah. so yeah. heh.... i still missed out quite a number of points though. i remember reading them, but somehow just forgot during the test. DAMN.

pe lesson we learnt quite a lot. i can do cartwheel though its not straight, and i did a backflip, although i was damn scared. tried 2 times but didnt do in the end. 3rd time finally did. i hate myself cos i dont dare to do forward roll and because of that i dont dare to do tripod stand and also because of that i dont think i'll dare to do headstand or handstand either. ARGH I HATE MYSELF. and my stupid phobia of breaking my neck. that week i did 2 forward rolls, 1st time ok and shocked. 2nd time i took it easy and ended up hurting my head and neck. my neck still havent recovered ok? wtf lah. and of all the things in the world, 我偏偏要怕 breaking my neck. argh i really really hate myself for that.

went home with crystal today. i know shes upset that they all forgot her birthday. haiz... what can i do to help??? i was thinking of something but it'll just be inconvenient for everyone. damn. anyway, we went sunplaza and ate at cavana. haha. actually i told crystal i'd treat her, but didnt in the end. sorry crystal. next time, my treat, ok? (: after that we went library a while to do homework, and then crystal said she had to go so ok lor. came home and slacked. have been slacking whole of today afternoon too. [u cant count morning, since i woke up at 1.30] i no mood to do homework. tml bah. i go watch videos liao. bye.



Hating myself more and more.
Wanting to keep my dreams, yet letting my fears overcome me.
Not having total control over my own life, just because I'm still a child.
But I have feelings, dreams, morals and beliefs too.
And I don't want to be caged in here like a bird.
Even though I know you won't let me out to fly.

I know you have your own beliefs.
And you think its for the best.
But I'll tell you something here right now.
You don't know me at all.
Cause I'm not who you think I am.

Hating my life because I'm trapped.
With no other choice but to do what you tell me to.
Not talking back nor arguing.
Because I don't want create any more trouble for you.
And I don't want you to be angry at me.
Even though I really want to have it my own way.

I know you have your own beliefs.
And you think its for the best.
But I'll tell you something here right now.
You don't know me at all.
Cause I'm not who you think I am.

- COPYRIGHTED by Joan [thanks for helping, joan (: HWNBAE. IABYC. HWNBAE. IABYC. ;D]

#301

12.30! haiz. im dreaming of how nice it'd be to sleep by 10. nice 7 and a half hour sleep....ahhh.... but im freaking tired and i still have work to do. damn. slept at 12.30 yesterday night. went to sch early today and met sufyan on the train. damn you sufyan... you are sooo dead cos im so gonna kill you. i met peishan on the bus. i wanted to do homework before assembly but ended up sleeping on my table. there was assembly after that and i was still damn tired. plus i had a stomachache. i really felt like sleeping.... somemore had morning jog. wth. i did 2 rounds (: or not. haha. i did 3 rounds lah. ok maybe 2. or 3. haha i dont know. XD figure it out yourself ;D

geog was after that and i slacked through. didnt bother to listen cos i was still really tired and had drama booklet to do. after geog i dragged my feet up to the toilet. then there was science. teacher went fast today, but i got the gist of it. recess i completed my drama booklet, then asked linglan to follow me to the canteen to buy food. [thanks linglan] i bought loads of food. then there was maths which we did some cube thing in a group. hcl was sian. did 长文缩短. i didnt do but managed to finish the work during the lesson. lastly, drama was ok. quite sad that its the last lesson already ): it was fun while it lasted. we did a final presentation. our group's one didnt really go according to our plans, but it was fair enough i suppose. the other half of the class joined us and they acted as one whole big group. our half was split into 2 groups.

after school i didnt go for lunch cos i was full. linglan and peishan were acting crazy while singing 不能说的秘密. it was damn funny. me and zhuangyun laughed like siao. until ms susan lim came to tell us to be more quiet or she'll chase us out of the classroom, cos the sec4s can hear us. oops... paiseh... sorry seniors.... ): i thought it wasnt that loud actually... cos the sec 4s were at the other block, should be cannot hear. aiya i also dunno lah... then after that we quietened down. then peishan zhuangyun and linglan went for lunch and i stayed in class doing sudoku. wenyi and caroline were there too. oh yah today morning teacher say can finally wear shoes into the com labs. (: yay. haha. feels weird, but its better cos now outside not crowded. last time outside always so crowded cos everyone finding for their shoes. cca i slacked. after cca i waited for wanjane and wenyi cos they had exco meeting. went home tgt aft tt. wanjane cut her hair and it looks weird. anyway im back home and i want to sleep at 10. i might just browse through maths and go slp, cos tml recess still can learn. dunno lah. feel very sick and tired and weak. argh damn it. I WANT TO SLEEP.

"You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give."
--Kahlil Gibran

#300 [MUNI IM CATCHING UP. although u hardly ever blog anymore... haiz...]

some memories are hard to forget. no matter what you do, they're still there somewhere in your head. some memories are easy to forget. just a day and you dont think about them anymore. is it better to remember or to forget? remembering them will bring you back to your past, but if you forget them, you wont have a past at all. neither is the right choice i suppose. so maybe we're supposed to remember some and forget some. which ones? and how are we to remember the ones that slip out of our minds so easily, or forget the ones which keep appearing in front of us?

i never knew you well. i thought i did, but i was wrong, wasnt i? or was i right after all? we used to be so close, but as we go different directions and walk on separate paths, we slowly forget our past. i used to remember everything so clearly and vividly, reminiscing the past. but as time passed, i slowly forgot about it. i forgot to recollect those memories. my memories became blurred and i didnt, couldnt, tell what everyone was like anymore. i thought i knew you best. maybe i did. maybe not. maybe i still do. or maybe i hardly know you anymore. you've changed, haven't you? but i think that deep inside, you still haven't changed one bit. you're still who i think you used to be. but then... you've really changed on the outside. so now its even harder for me to get through to you. i cant get past that barrier you set up. i cant delve any deeper than what you're showing us all. how long was it since the last time i talked to you? a few months, i'd say. we used to talk everyday. maybe not talk, we might have sat in silence, but i still knew that you were there beside me. and now you seem so much further away. the past month, i forgot to remember you at all. [im sorry] and when i remembered you again, it seems like just a memory. and now when we talk i feel as if i hardly know you anymore.





sunday i finished some homework and played audition. was planning to sleep at 10 but lynette made me do cme until 12. so damn sleepy today lah. had malay test today. it was ok. my lucky number today is 23. *wink* hah. yiinghuey will know what im talking about (: got back 2 tests today. elit was over 25 and eng was over 30. i did alright. clit was cut short today cos of the sec4 prelims. and we were released from class 15mins early. not bad la. crystal and her friends went to amk hub to celebrate today, but me and yiinghuey didnt go cos we had more important things to do. we went cwp and shopped. heres what i did: 1st shop - 2 items. 2nd shop - 1 item. 3rd shop - 2 items. 4th shop - 1 item. PHEW FINALLY DONE. lol. my legs were really tired. somemore carry schoolbag and walk all around. i think yiinghuey worse. [sorry that i took so long...] then at the end yiinghuey bought 1 item from the 5th shop and we went homeeeee. home sweet home. hey yiinghuey, thanks for coming along. got a whole lot of help from you. (:

i went home, bathed, used the com and fell asleep. was really damn tired. i short of 2 hours of sleep on sunday, then somemore walk around with schoolbags for 2 half hours leh. my mum came home and started scolding me cos she say i sleep and never help =.=" and she's very blind can. and her 反应迟钝. verryyy slow can. haiz. made me very annoyed so i didnt talk. i dont like to talk when im not in a good mood. i just pushed down dinner [the bittergourd is so freaking salty that i think i'll become sick. its supposed to taste bitter, for goodness sake! stupid coffeeshop, dunno how they do business de lor. next time if i have extra money and time i'll go sue them...] and went back to using the computer. my mum didnt nag so much after i eat finish dinner, which is good. i cant stand her. anyway, im supposed to do homework but i've been listening to music, choosing nice songs, and blogging for the past 2 hours. zzz... im such a slacker. and i feel like sleeping already. still very sleepy... i might sleep soon. see you around then.

#299

HONGKONG?! what the.... HAIZ... long explanation which i dont feel like giving. but still... HONGKONG??!! oh my tian. the first thing i think about when someone says 'hongkong' is: they speak chinese. haha. yeah i'll be going there sometime this year. confirm liao somemore. i dont mind, but im going with my aunt. which isnt going to be good. when i first heard it, i was still sleeping in bed. although my eyes were closed, my ears became wide open. and i shook my head like siao, even my mum could tell i didnt want to go. but she doesnt know that the real reason i dont want to go is cos my aunt is going. anyway, in the end i said ok cos my aunt said that other ppl going also, and got this family have kids around my age, one son and one daughter i think. so i suppose it'll be ok if i can talk to them.

anyway, i really did go watch rush hour 3 today. only 4 ppl though... quite pathetic. haha. me, aikching, kaycheong, and kaiyeat. so weird lah. we went to book seats first, then went food court to eat. I DONT LIKE FOOD COURT FOOD. ugh. but anyway aikching bought carrot cake and i didnt really like it so i bought hokkien mee, which was worse. and somemore $4 worth. i probably ate only $1.50 worth of it. kaycheong was shocked i think. hahaha.... feel so bad. but im just like that lah... aikching didnt finish hers either but she ate more. about $2.50 out of $3. haizzz.... after that we headed back to the cinema and bought popcorn and drinks. me and aikching shared popcorn and the 2 guys shared also.

anyway we waited really long for the show to start cos we went in early. the show was so damn funny (: but there was this girl and her group of friends sitting right behind us, and her laughter was like.. wtf lah. its not called laughing, its called shrieking. and it was so loud and piercing. i was damn irritated and pissed. kept turning back to stare at her lah. and its like there are a few scenes where something suddenly happens [eg. a car suddenly burst into flames and explode] and then she just screamed like nobody's business. no one else in the theatre was screaming lah. that was so freaking annoying. ARGH. just my luck to sit almost right in front of her. i dunno how the others could bear with it... or maybe it didnt affect them. i dont know. but it affected me badly.

after the show we all just went home. i reached home before my parents, which is good, cos i didnt tell them that i was going out. only my bro was at home and i told him i went library. although it doesnt matter if he knows i went to watch movie. the rest of the day i went video-craze as usual. i finished watching 2 series liao, one 20 episodes, one 16. not bad lah. (: although i havent written a word for my homework. will settle it somehow anyway. okay yeah thats all. hope you had as great a holiday as me. [or not. if you're guai then no, i suppose]



"A day can really slip by when you're deliberately avoiding what you're supposed to do."

#298

ok since im so damn bored now [because i confirmed 100% that i cant concentrate on homework in the afternoons] so i shall post outdated pictures which i wanted to post very long ago but never had the time.

our macbeth project when we stayed overnight at kialin's house. look how messy we were! :O

enrichment week. this is kollam i think. sort of forgot... ^^''

our 'masterpiece'

the banana leaf apollo

the light is so niceee (:

does it look like a high-class restaurant in this photo? :D haha...

yeah thats it. i'll post other photos next time if i have time. right now i wanna play audition since i cant concentrate on my homework. (: cya. [i might be watching rush hour 3 with fps friends tml (:]

#297

[motocross racing!!! XD]

wednesday we had national day celebration in school. somehow i felt unenthu. maybe cos zhuangyun was sitting next to me. haha.. ok no lah. but i seldom feel so unenthu during national day celebrations ): oh well. was quite fun, especially the performances. (: yeah.

after that, zhuangyun, peishan and me went to amk hub. we booked tickets for 'secret'. 4 tix. after that linglan met up with us. then we went to eat lunch. all of us ate nasi lemak except for linglan who ate roti prata. after lunch we walked around, went minitoons [i bought a nice street tag (:][even though it made me broke], and finally went up to the cinema to watch the show. linglan watched it before and she said the last time she watched, she cried twice. i said that if its really touching, at most i'll cry once only. i ended up not crying at all and staring weirdly at linglan who cried twice again. zhuangyun didnt cry. peishan said she want to cry but couldnt. o.O i think the movie was ok la.. but linglan and peishan say its really nice. different opinions bah. shant quarrel. after the movie, we followed linglan to buy bubble tea, then we all went home. i took same way home as peishan.

reached home around 3.30pm. i read a book, bathed, and started my video craze again. hurried for violin in the evening and lucky i wasnt late. violin lesson was ok for once. sort of. though the teacher was angry during the first part, but after that he was alright. he told me to play this old song which i havent practiced for around 2 months i think. luckily it was one of my fave songs so i played it well and he said good. thats rare. the last time i heard him say good was probably 3 weeks ago or something... anyway, went home and dinner was terrible. it was packeted food from food court. i ate a bit of the ingredients, 3/4 of the rice, and threw the whole styrofoam box away. if my mum knows, shes so gonna kill me. anyway, i was broke from the movie and i couldnt tell my mum i went to watch movie so i told her my friend borrowed some money from me. i dont have a guilty conscience for that, somehow. at night i video-crazed again until 2+am when i finally went to sleep cos my mum woke up and nagged at us. my bro didnt care, but i hate being nagged at so i went to sleep.



woke up at 1pm today and got scolded by my mum. actually its quite true. last time p4 weekends/holidays i wake up at around 8am. then p5 around 9am. p6 around 9 or 10am. sec1 became 10 or 11am. and sec2 became 11am or 12pm. now its become 1pm. wow. maybe by sec 4 it'll be like 3 or 4pm. haha. my mum will kill me sia. 1pm she already so mad. i woke up and went to wash my shoes cos my mum said so. first time i wash my shoe. seriously. i normally always just polish it and my mum washes it. my mum stopped nagging after i washed the shoes cos thats being guai and she seldom nags right after i finish doing something good. after that i exercised and ate lunch. and now im here. using the computer and going to go video crazy again. i havent started on any homework or revision, even though i planned to. i can never follow my planned schedules. oh well.

#296

[im still dreaming about motocross racing... *beams*]

haha so today... nothing much. didnt see anyone familiar on the train today ):
morning jog was ok, weirdly. i thought i'd be very tired but not really. felt good to train after quite a long time not jogging.
geography was alright. we grouped up and answered questions.
science was a bit confusing but its so easy to just go to the forum and ask questions (:
recess i went to play piano. and guess who i met? or rather, who came along. caroline, munfoong and wendy. havent really seen munfoong for quite a while already. we talked a bit and then went to buy food and went back to class. (: wheee munfoong is nice. unlike caroline. hahaha... ok la... just joking (:
maths was sian. i couldnt understand much.
hcl had 公函. i thought it would be easy but i underestimated it. my chinese really sucks. i didnt even understand the question and had to ask lynette! so paiseh lah... like that i think i can go back p4 to learn chinese sia. really so paiseh lah. dont even understand the question leh!!! ): felt so sad cos my chinese is so terrible. crapped a lot of things and didnt even know what i was writing lah. i think i'll fail bah...
drama was fun. my group: alicia, karen, trella, lydia, helena, kialin, zhuangyun, linglan, and me. i like their idea for the skit. (:

after school i went to buy food with jessica, then came back classroom and i tried to do my chem homework. didnt complete much. andrea and linglan were playing. at first they just pushed each other, then later they splashed water at each other all around the classroom. i got wet. but not as much as jacq's papers. ): poor jacq. but andrea and linglan went to tell the teacher about it so that the teacher wont scold jacq. i think that was really nice of them (: they settled it and came down aft tt to tell jacq. ppl started leaving the classroom for cca. i was the last to go, and i was sort of late. but nevermind.
during cca we slacked cos our section just finished competition. i continued with my chem hw. i sort of completed it, except for those questions which i dont know how to do [which is quite a lot actually... ^^'' whoops.] haha. tried studying chinese around the end of cca but everyone was assembling so i couldnt concentrate. and anyway i was too sleepy. [im looking forward to more sleeping time during the holidays. SO TIRED.]
after cca went home with wanjane. went to cwp with her... popular first and i bought correction tape. [wanjane's 'emo correction tape'] haha. i thought it was quite alright and probably take up less space in my pencilbox. aft tt she went off and i bought my dinner at kfc. to bring home. was carrying chinese dictionary somemore so my hand was so pain... *mumbles* reached home and ate until i was soooo full that my stomach hurt. im a greedy pig.. haiz.


HOLIDAY HOMEWORK/STUDY LIST :O
- study geog
- study maths
- study chinese [in advance]
- study clit
- study malay [=.=" but still...]
- CME project
- home ec project
- elit essay assignment
- chem worksheets
- chinese worksheets
- history portfolio assignment

SO MUCH!!!! and people like me still have the cheek to call it a holiday. homework days are worse than school days. I HATE HOMEWORK. they dont really help me learn. =.=" useless pieces of homework. yesterday i finished revising chinese 公函 in 1 hour, and i dont know how many lessons teacher used up to teach it. all the more reason for me to sleep in class. haha i know im famous for sleeping in class lor =.=" every time get caught by teacher de. haha... but fun also lah. and anyway, what to do? IM SLEEPY WHAT. (: byeee i shall go play audition and maybe do some homework.

MY DAD SAID HE'LL BRING ME MOTOCROSS RACING!!! YEAHHH!!! AND HE SAID MAYBE HE'LL GET ME A MOTOCROSS BIKE!!! YEAH I LOVE MY DAD!!!
and at least he knows me well (: my dad rocks.

well that was the first and foremost thing that i wanted to say. anyway the weekends i just slacked. rushed my maths portfolio from 11 - 11.45 yesterday night. haha. the usual. today felt like a school day at least. [i hate assembly man.... they just suck. cant we just assemble in class? its so irritating to keep moving about] oh yeah i saw alicia on the train today. then next stop sufyan came in. o.O weird. good timing i suppose =.= haha. i was studying like siao for elit. took 76 today cos it came and alicia taking it. normally i would've preferred 265 but no matter.

elit test was okay. well all tests are okay to me. no diff actually. they're just tests. big deal. malay lesson our teacher say next week have test. damn. have to study. then recess me and linglan went library and i saw melissa and jacq there. [hey thanks for the book melissa (:] i returned and borrowed books while linglan printed something. after that we went to canteen to buy food. maths teacher didnt come today so form teacher took over. sian. english lesson ok la... clit sian. thats all. after school we took photos for connexio. i took with yiinghuey, kialin, melissa and jacq. (: so fun. and melissa was so enthu. haha. high, rather. i went home with yiinghuey and met peishan and eileen at bus stop. they took 269 though. read the book i borrowed from library on the way home. went home, read the book, slept, bathed, used the comp.



to my friend who's going to njc cos of ip - im gonna miss you next year. actually when i heard that shes going, i quite regretted the fact that i didnt apply. and i was thinking of how i went into gep. i sorta miss the feeling of being in gep. and ip is something like that. i could have applied and i would have, but... i just didnt. it could be cos i didnt have the time to apply, or didnt bother to find out how to apply, or cos i have friends in sn, but i think the main reason is cos even though i know i can cope with life there, i prefer slacking. if i dont slack daily then im not me. firstly, im not guai at all. all my homework, i just do it cos i know that if i dont, my parents will scold me cos the teacher will tell them. if i had my way, i'll only do homework which is fun to me. and i wont do projects which are useless crap. I AM NOT GUAI. i wish some ppl will stop calling me guai. cos im not guai at all. i do hw cos thats what i have to do. its compulsory. unless i want to see my parents go nuts.

i wish she wouldnt think that she knows me so well. cos almost no one does. and she doesnt. she thinks im guai and smart and attentive and am someone she can communicate well with. im not. she does her homework cos she's guai. i do it cos its compulsory. she keeps asking me questions cos she thinks i listen in class. i dont and i have no idea what the answer to her questions are. she keeps laughing or opening her mouth in shock at things but how am i to tell her that i think its cool? i really have no idea how to communicate with her. if maybe she doesnt think that she knows me so well, then i think i can somehow talk to her like a good friend again. but now i dont know what she's thinking at all. probably thinking what the hell is up with my coldness.



I CANT WAIT TO RIDE A MOTOCROSS BIKE!!!

#294

wow. its been really long since the last time i blogged. 4 days span! tsk tsk... well thats cos i've been busy through the week. and im getting really tired nowadays too so thats why i hardly had time to do anything extra [eg. blog, play games, update stuff, etc.] well its finally friday and im still very tired. shall blog for a while then play then bathe then sleep (: schedule planned.

TUESDAY 31 July 2007

didnt finish my home ec portfolio yesterday, so did it today. worked on a draft during lessons, before cca, and during cca. finished the draft, but sadly enough, that was only for print ads. still had tv/youtube ad. well, when i got home, i typed out the draft onto the computer and crapped something out for the tv ad. after that, i started studying science but apparently.. whenever i study i fall asleep =.= especially at night. in the afternoon maybe not. so anyway i fell asleep while studying science. managed to finish studying in the end, quite late at night. wrote notes on a tiny piece of paper - both sides.

WEDNESDAY 1 August 2007

studied when going to school but i think i fell asleep while studying anyway. cant be too sure cos i cant rmb. i tried studying in class but ended up either sleeping or listening but not studying. =.= but anyway, science test was easy except for one question. thank you mr teoh!!! :D haha. he said no one ever calls his tests difficult. i quite agree. if i studied for that one question then i would probably find the whole paper damn easy. oh well. sadly i think i missed out on that topic while studying so yeah... ): haha.

stayed back after school to work on the national day deco. it was really boring work. as i said, 'i feel like a machine.' that might summarise stuff. haizzz... anyway, all the other classes in the school were also doing up their deco. we did it on the day right before the judging day, whereas quite a number of other classes already started doing theirs a few days back. very few people stayed back and many people were really disappointed/angry/frustrated/tired. well maybe the phrase 'no class spirit' would summarise it up. oh yeah the hockey girls stayed back to do it too, even though they had training. it was only when someone came for the 3rd time or so to tell them that the cca teacher was really angry that they finally went off. nice of them, really. but anyway, just something i took note of - some ppl were really really pissed at those who didnt come. oh well.

got home late and had to rush like siao for violin lesson. after violin lesson i was really tired and had another one of those headaches. those bad ones which i sometimes have... haiz. was planning to do maths hw but ended up surfing the web a little. my headache got better. fell asleep while on the comp. woke up later and went to bed.

THURSDAY 2 August 2007

school is tiring. before cca i was sleeping and so i went in a bit late for cca. :\ oops. by the time i got home aft theory, it was 9.30pm. ate dinner and it was around 10pm. studied for history but as usual, ended up sleeping. woke up around 12am and studied again. went to sleep around 1am.

FRIDAY 3 August 2007

woke up at 5am to study for history. unfortunately i didnt have much time. ): tried to study on the train but i fell asleep. couldnt study on the bus. came to school and tried stuffing as much things into my brain as possible. sort of worked. oh yah today had prize presentation :\ so weird to be at the specs stand. anyway, i cant believe mr imran forgot to mention sherlyn... like what the hell lah... cant he count? the number of names on his list and the number of people there didnt even match. surely he should double check or something right? ... ... ... haiz. anyway, had history test after that. it was quite okay except for the source-based ones, cos im not good at those.

didnt do much through the day today. during gym, teacher made me do a forward roll. 1st time was ok. 2nd time my head hurt. teacher say its cos i didnt tug in my head. =.= fine... anyway, didnt roll anymore after that cos i felt that i had enough for one day. i dont like rolls... although backward roll seems much nicer, even though i still cant roll =.= have a phobia of it. zzz. what the hell. anyway, we also learnt straddler [is this how u spell it?] jump. it was so much more fun compared to rolls. ok not more fun, but less dangerous.

after school, i actually wanted to go home with crystal but found out that she went already. so i went home the normal way. slept till kranji. something like this hasnt happened for very long already. i must not oversleep again. damn. well thats a few days' posts. (: haha. shall go off to play now. cya. [yes i know my life nowadays just revolves around sleeping. but seriously, im not getting enough sleep!]